October 13, 1999
LIFE & WORK SERIES:
Parents: Be a kid with your
kid every now & then
___Ephesians 6:4
___By Brett Younger
___Lake Shore Baptist Church, Waco
___Few things infuriate parents more than an unmarried man without children giving advice on how to be better parents. Paul made a habit of being infuriating. He writes, "Fathers, do not exasperate your children..." (Ephesians 6:4). J.B. Phillips translates the Greek word "parorgizete" as "overcorrect": "Fathers, don't overcorrect your children." The New English Bible has: "You fathers must not goad your children to resentment." Clarence Jordan paraphrases: "You fathers, don't aggravate your kids."
___Why would Paul address this command directly to fathers? It's easy to imagine Paul thinking back on his childhood as he writes from prison. Maybe Paul's mother was a patient and nurturing parent while Paul's father offered little tenderness and much severity.
___Too many children, discouraged by continuous criticism and inconsistent discipline, end up with broken spirits. Paul is right; the first part of a father's job is not to get in the way.
___After our family decided to go the circus, my son, Caleb, who was 3 at the time, could talk of little else. His dreams were filled with elephants jumping through fiery hoops, unicyclists juggling burning bowling balls, human pyramids of 15 people balanced on a man's nose and bears dancing on zebras riding on the high wire. I kept getting in the way by trying to lower his expectations.
___When we arrived at the big top, I started aggravating. I claimed to have heard a vender shout: "Who wants to spend $5 of your parents' money for a shiny plastic trinket that costs 11 cents to manufacture and won't get home in one piece?" I pointed out how glad I was not to be the guy with the shovel. I wondered aloud, "What kind of mother raises a plate spinner?"
___Fortunately, my child's joyfulness overcame my exasperating cynicism. Caleb howled at the clowns with huge heads, found the stilt walker beyond explanation and thought the guy in a gorilla suit who stole the woman's purse was hilarious. Caleb was as wonder-struck by it all as if he had been transported to Narnia or Wonderland.
___After awhile, I stopped being irritating and started being amazed. We saw the Amazing Tortellinis (or something like that) from Italy, the Amazing Quesadillas from Peru and the Amazing Herbivores from France. (Why can't there be a trapeze act named the Amazing Smiths from New Jersey?) The acrobats did things with a springboard you don't want your children trying on the seesaw. (I couldn't help but notice that their outfits looked a lot like the Kilgore Rangerettes.) When my son thanked me for taking him to the circus, I realized it was he who had taken me to the circus.
___Rainer Maria Rilke wrote, "Grown-up people who have occupations and cares and who worry themselves about mere trifles gradually lose the eye for these riches, while children, if they are observant and good, quickly notice and love with their whole heart." With our children's help, we can be parents who share life.
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