May 5, 1999

FAMILY MATTERS:
Help children learn ways to say thanks
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We recently had a discussion in our home over whether or not a child should write a thank-you note for a birthday gift from his grandparents. Our son is 11, and he received a check from his grandparents, who live out of state. I feel he should acknowledge the gift. I don't want him to grow up being unappreciative. My husband says they don't expect a note when they do something for their grandchild.
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KAY TOWERS Program Coordinator LifeWay Fellowship Killeen

It's appropriate to teach our children, regardless of age, to appreciate what someone, even a grandparent, has done for them. Children should not come to the point of expecting or taking for granted acts of kindness.
___In order to become adults who are grateful and express appreciation, it is important to learn such manners as a child.
___I applaud you for wanting to train your son in this area.
___Remember Jesus' experience of the one cleansed leper who returned to say, "Thank you."
___There are different ways to express one's thankfulness:
___ At his age, he can write a note or a letter. It does not have to be long, but a personal note is often a treasured keepsake for a grandparent.
___ If both families have computers, e-mail is another option.
___ For younger children, there are thank-you postcards, where the child fills in the blanks, you can purchase.
___ A written note is not always necessary. Sometimes, a phone call is just as appreciated.
___ When money is received as a gift, you can send a picture of the child with the item purchased.
___ Young children also can draw a picture of what was bought or draw their own thank-you cards.
___Remind your child that the Bible teaches us to be thankful.
___Ephesians 5:20 says to always give thanks for all things.
___Not only should the child thank the one who showed kindness, but she or he should thank the Lord for that person.
___Remember, you are a role model for your child. Children imitate what they see adults do. Do you give thanks to the Lord? Does your child see you express gratitude to those who do things for you?
___Don't forget to thank God for the privilege and opportunity you have to rear your son in God's ways.
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