November 13, 2000
FAMILY MATTERS:
Teen needs assistance in helping mother
___I think there's something wrong with my mom. She cries all the time, and she's always on edge. I try to do everything just right, and I try not to make her mad. Sometimes I think she's never going to be happy again. What can I do?
DEBBIE CHISOLM
Minister to Students
Royal Lane Baptist Church, Dallas
___One of the hardest things in life is to watch someone you love hurt and not be able to help them. It makes you feel helpless, and it also can be frightening sometimes. I gather from your question that your mom hasn't always been unhappy. There is an endless list of possible causes, but here are couple to begin with:
___I don't know how old your mom is, but our bodies are strange and wonderful machines. They constantly are changing, and that can affect us emotionally. Different organs in our bodies secrete all kinds of hormones and enzymes that impact the way we feel. If there's an imbalance in our system, we can feel hot even though everyone else in the room is comfortable. This imbalance can cause us to be on edge, moody and just generally irritable. We're blessed to live in a place where doctors and medicines can be found easily. Your mom may need to make an appointment with her doctor. A simple blood test could show if there were an imbalance in her body.
___Sometimes there are situations and circumstances that just can't be shared. Let your mom know you love her and worry about her, but don't try and get her to tell you exactly what it is that's causing her to feel so depressed.
___Please know that your mom's happiness is not your responsibility. You aren't helping her or yourself by trying to be perfect and not doing anything wrong. Just be yourself, and of course continue to be sensitive to her needs.
___During this time it would be very helpful for you to have someone to talk with. Perhaps a school counselor, a minister or a Sunday School teacher could meet with you once a week just to talk.
___Regardless of the cause of her sadness, your mom is very lucky to have you in her life.
___
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