DOWN HOME:
The Christmas Chicken bids holiday greetings
___Now's the time to add another symbol to your holiday menagerie.
___I rise, but not too far, to nominate the Christmas Chicken.
___See, we live on a short street in a new subdivision. In fact, this is only the sixth
Christmas for homes on our street. But what we lack in tradition, we make up for with vigor: Practically all the families on our street decorate their houses and/or yards to celebrate Christmas.
___Unfortunately, someone started upping the decorative ante about three or four Christmases ago.
___I think it was the guy in the first house on the left, who mounted huge Disney characters in Santa costumes on his roof, fence and trees.
___Then came the landscaper, who outlined his roof in red and green lights and set his trees to sparkling with twinkly lights.
___Somewhere in there, Jarrell put up his white manger scene--the most elegant and tasteful display on the street --complete with large cut-outs of Jesus, Mary, Joseph and animals, all cast aglow in spotlights.
___And Ray, directly across the street from our house, strung light "icicles" from his roof, covered his shrubs in colored bulbs, bathed his crepe myrtles in white lights and outlined his yard in the hues of a rainbow.
___Up until this year, I draped our hedges in lights and wrapped a holly for good measure. But we pulled up the hedges last summer, and shortly after Thanksgiving, I realized my best light-hanging plants were gone, gone.
___So, I bought some "icicles," borrowed Jarrell's extension ladder and headed for the roof. About five minutes later, I realized how high the tip-top roofline towers above the front door. On the way up, I remembered my long-lost acrophobia ("height-o-phobia" to all us non-Latin-speaking folks). I don't mind singing "Nearer, My God, to Thee," but I always, always mean it in a spiritual sense.
___After a few minutes, I got Lindsay to hold the ladder while I climbed to a lower part of the roof, just to see if I could access the high part from the lower part, without having to lean from a ladder to attach "icicles." I probably could, but I'm told it's hard to decorate a roof while wearing a parachute.
___Next, I instructed Lindsay to hold the ladder while I caught up on my prayer life. Then I climbed down.
___Joanna says the store will give us a refund for my "icicles." Unfortunately, I'm on my own with the acrophobia and self-esteem issues.
___If you drive down our street, take your time. Enjoy Jarrell's nativity scene. And when you come to the house with eight strands of lights swathed around a shortish 5-year-old oak, honk holiday cheer in honor of the Christmas Chicken, seasonal symbol of low-down decorations.
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The Baptist Standard
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