January 12, 2000

Baptist divorce rate higher than average
___"Born-again" Christians are more likely to go through a marital split than are non-Christians, according to a new study by the Barna Research Group.
___Using statistics drawn from a nationwide survey of nearly 4,000 adults, the Barna data show 11 percent of the adult population currently is divorced but that 25 percent of all adults have experienced at least one divorce.
___Among "born-again" Christians, 27 percent currently are divorced or previously have been divorced, compared with 24 percent among adults who are not "born again."
___Surprisingly, the Barna report said, the Christian group whose adherents have the highest likelihood of getting divorced are Baptists. The only group to surpass Baptists were Christians associated with non-denominational Protestant churches.
___This research underscores the need for church-based marriage and family enrichment ministries, according to Mike Lundy, family ministry associate with the Texas Baptist Christian Life Commission.
___"What the figures reveal is that Baptist families are experiencing the same stresses as those in society at large," he said.
___And Baptists and other evangelical Christians are responding to those stresses in the same way as the larger culture, he added. "We've created a climate for divorce in our society, and Baptists seem to be reflecting the values of society."
___The Texas CLC developed its "Hope for Home" program to help churches develop ministries to strengthen families and enrich marriages. Developing Christian families is one of the five priority areas of the Baptist General Convention of Texas missions emphasis called Texas 2000.
___Realistically, Lundy would not expect even a great response by churches to result in a sudden reversal of trends toward divorce, but that doesn't mean churches shouldn't work to shape a more positive future, he said.
___"Churches should not expect to see a quick pay-off for family ministry," Lundy advised. "They should view it as a long-term investment that will continue to yield returns over the years."
___Lundy offered several suggestions for churches:
___ Offer marriage enrichment. Marriage enrichment is a growth-oriented educational approach to strengthening relationships. Marriage enrichment encourages communication that leads to understanding, and it teaches constructive ways to handle conflict.
___"While a weekend retreat is valuable, the best programs are those that are of some duration and that build in a support system," he said.
___Lundy recommends forming a group of five or six couples--either from one church or from several churches in an area--who meet once a month for at least one year. The couples relate common experiences and offer mutual support. At the end of the year, they have the opportunity to renew their commitment to each other or to form new marriage enrichment groups.
___ Develop mentoring couples. Older married couples in a church can walk alongside younger couples to help them through stressful times and to model healthy, growing relationships.
___"A mentoring couple is a married couple with some wealth of relationship experience they can share with an engaged or newly married couple," Lundy explained.
___Some churches have told engaged couples they must be paired with a mentoring couple before they can be married in the church, he reported.
___Through Hope for Home, the Texas CLC offers training for potential mentoring couples. These couples can serve in a role older relatives once filled when extended families lived closer to each other.
___"The church can do some of its best work by creating a sense of family," Lundy said.
___ Affirm mutual submission. "Submission is a good word--a word we need to embrace. It is central to our experience in Christian discipleship. We need to lift up the concept of submission, but not a one-sided view of it," Lundy said. "Submission is central to the Christian life, coming out of our decision to follow Christ. It is integral to our relationship with God and with one another."
___The biblical view of submission is a mutual give and take, he explained. It was modeled by Jesus as he washed the disciples' feet and gave himself sacrificially for others and still is modeled by the church as believers submit to Christ's Lordship.
___Biblical submission is not imposed, Lundy added. "It flows freely and voluntarily out of the rhythms within a relationship, each giving to the other in love in countless ways. It is not a matter of hierarchy. It is not over/under. It is alongside."
___ By Ken Camp of Texas Baptist Communications, with additional reporting by RNS
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