May 22, 2000

TOGETHER:
Now we have one in heaven and eight with us
___Carrington Grace Kelly is a big name for a little girl.
___She came rushing into our lives last week. Richard came outside the room to invite us to come and see. What a glorious moment in any family's life. There was Karee and her

CHARLES WADE Executive Director, BGCT Executive Board

gorgeous little baby.
___Richard beemed with a tender and proud smile. Then, they announced the name.
___I thought, "that has a beautiful ring to it."
___Rosemary said, "She will have a tough time learning to spell that by kindergarten."
___I said, "Carrington reminds me of the Greek word 'charis' which means grace and gift. We have a double grace gift from God in her little life."
___Rosemary and I give thanks to God for our family. But there is a heartache that we feel, too. We have another granddaughter, Emily, who is in heaven. We never got to know her, but she was a very real presence in our lives. She was Rick and Roshelle Risenhoover's third child, their first daughter.
___First, we rejoiced that a baby was on the way. Then, we heard the devastating news, "She has Down syndrome."
___Our hearts felt like they had gone dead within us. But we watched with wonder and pride as Rick and Roshelle dealt with their disappointment and pain. Roshelle is a professional speech pathologist and was working with many children with Down syndrome and their families. One of the mothers wrote her a letter saying: "I know this is the most difficult thing you have had to face. But I am so thankful for your little girl that she will have a mother and daddy like you and Rick. You will be so good for her." That support helped a lot.
___Then, I learned a painful lesson. People would ask, "Do you want a boy or a girl?" Our response in the past had been, "We don't care, as long as it's healthy." We all discovered that a baby is so dear a gift to our lives that even if he or she is not healthy, she is still a precious gift.
___We began to prepare for her birth. We noticed in ways we never had before the children around us who had Down syndrome. We found a calendar with 12 pictures of darling children with Down syndrome whose parents loved and took pride and joy in them.
___There was deep grief when the baby died. No words could be said. The pain is still real. The loss is deep.
___Though we have two granddaughters born since then, they don't take her place--they have their own special place in our family. Roshelle added the final e to her name in honor of her little girl, Emily.
___We found that God could hold us up. That we needed each other. That you can laugh again and rejoice in babies who would be born later.
___But we have found that nothing can take her place. She has her own place in our lives and memories.
___I read a little book they gave us at the hospital. One grandparent said, "When asked how many grandchildren do you have, I say, 'We have seven; one in heaven and six with us.'" Rosemary and I don't always say that lest it bring sadness to others. But there are times now when we say, "We have nine; one in heaven and eight with us."
___It is always true ...
___We are loved.


Send this story to a friend

---

Contents/ Masthead / Why We're Here / Links / Archive / E-mail us/ SUBSCRIBE!