September 25, 2000
FAMILY MATERS:
Setting clear goals is an Olympic task
___My child and I have been watching the Olympics on television. She now has decided she wants to reach the Olympics in gymnastics. How does a parent help a child develop clear goals balanced with childhood fantasies?
___Children's dreams and fantasies are themselves the developmental exercises that help prepare them for the significant steps of Christian faith. It's likely that she will change her dreams and desires many times.
KAY TOWERS
Program Coordinator
LifeWay Fellowship, Killeen
___In school-age children, there is usually a fantasy period regarding what they want to be when they grow up. Capitalize on this time by listening to her expectations and brainstorming about the things she wants to be. Discuss what it would be like. Even if the dream seems unrealistic to you, it's important to her, so explore the possibilities.
___Young children learn through play. Encourage her through play. By playing out a role, a child learns more about self and her world. Pretend with her as she takes on different roles. Dress up, dialogue--get involved. Take field trips to see the people in the careers in which she shows an interest. At some point, she will move out of the fantasy world and into reality.
___As your child grows, she will begin to think more realistically about her choices. She will want to know more about her options. She will ask questions. At these times, you can provide information through discussions. Check out books from the library and introduce her to people in the field. Schools provide information on careers that help children begin to formulate ideas. Be affirming as your child comes to her own conclusions. Remind her that she can become whatever she desires with hard work and a commitment to the task.
___The wisdom writer offers you an important directive, "Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it" (Proverbs 22:6). "In the way he should go" means "according to his natural bent." Parents must prayerfully discover God's design for their children and train them accordingly.
___Christian parents have a responsibility to point out to their children that regardless of what they choose to be in life, the important thing is to do it to the best of their ability and in a manner that would honor God. Be a good role model for her. Pray for her as she grows. Give her the encouragement and support that will allow her eventually to make that choice.
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