December 30, 2002

Buckner program teaches parents to set boundaries
___By Russ Dilday
___Buckner News Service
___LUBBOCK--It's a simple craft project: Make a snowman calendar from colorful, pre-cut foam board. But there's a hitch--and it has a purpose.
___Alisa Sisemore distributes the craft packets to the waiting hands of parents in the Buckner Nurturing Program meeting in the cafeteria of George Mahon Head Start in Lubbock.
___Each participant begins work, but soon runs into trouble

PARENTS Chris and LeeAnn Vega work together on a craft project as part of the Buckner Nurturing Program at George Mahon Head Start. The exercise sought to teach the couple, who have four boys, the importance of giving children structure and instructions.

. Sisemore has removed the instructions from the packages, leaving participants to muddle through the craft.
___This difficulty presents a teaching opportunity for Sisemore, supervisor for Community-Based Services for Buckner Children and Family Services in Lubbock.
___The lesson is about communication.
___"We don't give our children instructions," she tells the group of parents. "We send them out without a lot of instructions, then we are inconsistent. We tell them one thing one day and something different the next day."
___Then, placing a model calendar at the table along with an instruction manual, Sisemore drives home the point: "All your children want instructions. They may not act like they do and they may not ask for them, but they want guidance."
___This is a typical activity in the nurturing program, which combines fun with education for the parents of children enrolled at Mahon Head Start.
___The exercise was "hard at first," admitted Annette Vega, a mother of four boys. However, the lesson taught her that her children "don't do exactly what I tell them to because I don't elaborate on what they need to know."
___"I learned you can't build anything without structure," added John DeLeon, whose son Cory is 4. "I'm his role model. He looks up to me. Every time I do something, he acts like me. This helps me further him in life."
___Larry Galvan wants to learn how to be a better dad for his 5-year-old son, Lawrence, he said, because "I didn't have a father growing up."
___Many parents in the nurturing program classes have stories like Galvan's, Sisemore said. "Parents are the foundation of what children become. We are trying to mend some broken foundations because so many families don't have good foundations. We're really involved in putting families back together."
___To illustrate family foundations, Sisemore had the parents in an earlier class build a house from simple materials, but she didn't give them anything to build on.
___Other classes in the six-week sessions have introduced parents to communication, praise and encouragement, and stress and anger management.
___The Buckner program is part of an overall Assuring Better Children parenting program run by Nickie Zambrano, parent involvement specialist at Mahon Head Start. The larger program includes nutrition classes, social services, communication and life skills training.
___Della Frye, director of Head Start for Lubbock Independent School District, said she's noticed the nurturing program puts "joy and pleasure on the parents' faces--listening to them share ideas and the enjoyment that comes from being at a school. Buckner is so valuable to us--that ability to flex and give something different each week. That's what we've seen."
___The program is important, she said, because "having parents at school improves the success of children. Kids know that mom thinks school is important and the child thinks, 'I must be pretty important, too.'"
___

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