September 30, 2002
EIGHT IS NOT ENOUGH:
Buckner aids grieving family
___By Scott Collins
___Buckner News Service
___McALLEN--Guadalupe Hernandez is dying.
___The cancer that so painfully engulfs her body is about to end her life. When that happens, she will leave behind eight children, including six under the age of 14.
___As she lies in bedat the Comfort House hospice in McAllen, her six youngest children surround their mother. Watching them brings a smile to her gaunt face as she talks about the future and spending more time with the kids when she is better.
WITH JUST WEEKS to live, Guadalupe Hernandez enjoys regular visits with her children from her bed at the Comfort House hospice in McAllen. Six of her eight children are being cared for at the Buckner Rio Grande Children's Home in Mission.
___Comfort House is a place people go when they have less than three months to live. Hernandez has been here two months. And while she won't admit she's dying, her emaciated body tells another story.
___One by one, she names the children, reaching out and touching each child as she predicts the future. One will be a banker. Another will do well if he is a good student. Another will be "a good professional in the business area."
___It is the children, Hernandez says, who define her life. The 37-year-old mother has spent most of her life doing backbreaking labor in the fields. When she couldn't work in the fields, she picked up cans on the side of the road. But it has been a struggle just to feed and clothe the children and keep a roof over the family's head.
___"When I think about life," she says, "I think about having a lot of life to see my kids growing up. That to me is life--seeing my children grow up."
___But Hernandez is not raising her children now. That job has fallen to the staff at Rio Grande Children's Home, a ministry of Buckner Children & Family Services. The six younger children moved to the Baptist home when their mother entered the hospice. The children's home is one of the few places in the Lower Rio Grande Valley able to take all six children and keep them together.
___"Providing a home for the children is consistent with the mission of Buckner," said Melanie Martinez, residential services director. "We will assist in preserving the family by providing and enriching the lives of the children with respect for their human dignity, nurturing their spiritual, emotional, educational, social and physical needs. We will strengthen the bonds between the children by keeping the family together."
___For that, Hernandez is grateful. She knows the cancer prevents her from caring for the children, and she knows the children's home is her children's best hope for now.
___"People need to know that we are in the business of preserving families even through the loss of a loved one," Martinez said. "Buckner takes God's word seriously when he instructs us to care for the orphaned children.
GUADALUPE Hernandez smiles as her children gather around her bed at the Comfort House. Although terminally ill, visits from her children bring joy to the mother of eight. (Russ Dilday/Buckner Photos)
___"The children will have a future with the support of Buckner. We are the fortunate ones, because we get to work with these children on a daily basis, and we can share with others what God is doing in the lives of these children."
___Hernandez's small room at Comfort House is getting smaller as the six children crowd around her bed for a photograph. She has requested pink lipstick and fingernail polish for the occasion. With her children nestled all around her for the photo, Hernandez manages a weak smile. The youngest snuggles under his mother's arm.
___"I am happy--very, very happy," she says at seeing her children all together.
___While Hernandez is happy today, Martinez said Buckner staff see the sadness that is settling over the entire family.
___"We see both the mother and children mourning and grieving," Martinez explained. "But we are here and available at this crucial time to provide comfort to the family. Guadalupe can be comforted knowing that her children are being cared for. On the other hand, the children are comforted by the support they are receiving from the staff as we work through the issues of their loss."
___In the meantime, the children will continue living at Rio Grande Children's Home, according to Tommy Speed, administrator of Buckner Children & Family Services in the Rio Grande Valley. But Buckner is seeking additional financial support to help this large family.
___"Helping these children and others like them is our calling," Speed said. "But anyone who has raised a child knows it's expensive. I just pray we can enable Guadalupe to rest in peace knowing that we love these children like they are our own."
___To help with the care of the Hernandez children and others in the care of Buckner, contact Neal Knighton at (214) 758-8050.
___
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