hesaid_frontseat_10603

Posted: 10/3/03

He Said/ She Said:
Front seat

She Said:

My space has been invaded, and I want it back.

Luke and Garrett recently reached the magical weight and height that allows them to sit in the front seat of the car. I gave them a lecture off the bat telling them not to argue over whose turn it is to sit in front or neither of them would get to be up there in the seat of privilege. I remember fighting with my brother over the front seat many times, and I wanted to head that problem off from the start.

Little did I know that the “whose-turn-is-it” argument was the least of my troubles.

Now I have to contend with channel changers, a/c fiddlers, drink-holder hoggers and a dozen questions “What's that for?”, “Are you going the speed limit?”, “What does this do?”

I've also lost the space for my purse and various other sundries I keep in the seat next to me.

Luke, jokester that he is, recently adjusted the temperature to hot after I turned off the car, so that the next time we got in, I turned on the air conditioner and couldn't understand why it wasn't cooling off quicker. I quickly filled him in on why that was not funny in 100-degree weather.

The radio and CD player are another ongoing turf war. My contention that the driver controls the music hasn't gone over too well.

But I usually win by mentioning that the front seat is a privilege, not a right.

Of course, I realize that argument is going to backfire on me when they start driving. Don't worry–we'll warn you when the twins are getting ready to hit the streets.

He Said:

Remember the old bumper sticker that said, “God is my co-pilot”? Well, God just got booted to the back seat by Luke and Garrett. They think they're giving the directions now.

Although I don't think God would recline the co-pilot seat all the way back until his whacked his brother in the knees. And I don't think God would click the window button back and forth until the driver wanted to scream. It's possible God would open the glove box and rifle through all the contents.

MARK WINGFIELD

On the other hand, maybe God will keep the back seat cleaner than Luke and Garrett have done. Cleanliness is next to godliness, you know.

These days, I never know what position I'll find the passenger seat in when I get in the car. Sometimes it's fully reclined; other times it's so ramrod straight no sane adult could sit there comfortably.

All this is made possible by the fact that Luke and Garrett seem to have grown several inches over the summer. Some days when I come home from work, it looks like they've grown more since I left them at breakfast that morning.

This is another way they annoy their mother, of course, now that they are approaching her height. They constantly want to measure their height against hers. That is, in fact, the way we finally decided they were tall enough to sit in the front seat. If mom can ride in the passenger seat, we reasoned, then they probably could too.

So now we never know which way the air will blow or whether it will blow hot or cold. These are minor trials, however, compared to the impending era of learning to drive.

We'll definitely need God as the co-pilot then.