Cybercolumn by Jeanie Miley: Praying when you don’t know what to pray

Posted: 4/07/06

CYBER COLUMN:
Praying when you don’t know what to pray

By Jeanie Miley

Coming in from the ICU, I was exhausted and anxious. I’d gotten the call to meet my husband again at the Emergency Room, and one more time, I’d been scared out of my wits.

Once things were stabilized, I headed home, praying specifically that the doctors would do something. Mostly, my prayer was “Help! Help us, please!”

The next night, however, I informed my adult children that I needed an hour alone. For an hour, I was simply going to sit in the silence, holding in my mind the presence of the Living Christ and my husband, as if the three of us were sitting together.

Time was when I knew exactly how to pray for my loved ones. It was no problem for me to inform God about how he should run the world, and I was pretty sure that it was my job to be as specific as possible about my prayer requests.

As life has become more complicated and complex, however, I’ve come to the place of knowing for sure that, most often, I’d better be careful about telling God what to do. In fact, I’ve come to the place of simply holding the needs of others before God and then just listening and waiting in an attitude of receptivity and quiet.

On this scary night, I was too tired to think clearly and I did not know for sure what was going to happen at the hospital when doctors began ordering tests and prescribing treatments. There was confusion about what to do, and I was certain that I didn’t know what needed to be done.

I did know, however, that prayer was needed, and so I began my hour of silence.

Over the last two decades, I’ve spent a lot of time in silence, simply resting in the Presence of God. My silence is symbolic of my consent to the presence and action of God. I suppose, in a way, that my silent, receptive prayer actually is a prayer that says, “Thy will be done.”

Practicing listening or receptive prayer means that I take my hands off the results or the outcome. I give up my expectations of what God is going to do and simply wait for God to move as God will. To wait on God means that I surrender my agenda to the sovereignty of God.

I really would like for God to reward my silence with some specific message that is clear and straight-forward, but I have come to the place of knowing that while God’s ways are not my ways, God does work mysteriously, redemptively and in the fullness of time.

The next morning, a procedure that the doctor had proposed had to be postponed because of a medication that had been given. We were disappointed.

The next morning after that, we got word that the procedure had been cancelled altogether because the risk factor was too great.

Last Wednesday night, my husband was teaching from Romans 8, and when he came to the part about how when we do not know how to pray the Spirit intercedes for us on our behalf with groanings too deep for words, I began to weep.

Indeed, God is at work in all things, attempting to bring about good. God is at work in all things even when we are attempting to run the show and control the outcome.

God is at work in all things, and I hope I have enough sense to remember to keep on being still and quiet and let God take the lead.

Jeanie Miley is an author and columnist and a retreat and workshop leader. She is married to Martus Miley, pastor of River Oaks Baptist Church in Houston, and they have three adult daughters. Got feedback? Write her at Writer2530@aol.com.