RIGHT or WRONG? Win or reconcile?

Posted: 1/30/08

RIGHT or WRONG?
Win or reconcile?

Years ago, I was taught church members should be able to work out their differences with patience and respect. Now, most Christians seem to prefer fighting and winning to reconciliation. This is about to drive me out of my church. What can I do to “hang in there” and make a difference?

An ethic has been around a long while—the ethic of “win/win” at all cost. Business training has emphasized it. Stress-management programs have adapted it. Financial planners use it. The airwaves bombard us with advertisements from consultants, trainers and promoters who offer “win/win” solutions.

Even “prosperity gospelers” proclaim this philosophy as God’s will for our lives. No one wants to be considered a “loser.” Winning is supposed to show superior wit, good contacts and success. In religious circles, some use it to prove God’s divine favor.

Turn to God’s word for guidance to this situation.

When asked about the qualifications for entrance into God’s kingdom (Luke 10:25), Jesus began by quoting the Shema (Deuteronomy 6:4, 5): “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all our mind, and love your neighbor as yourself.” To love God means God must be first in our loyalty and obedience. No other person, philosophy or ideology is to replace God.

But God is more than a commandment. God offers us a relationship. If we are in true relationship with God, our only desire is to follow God’s leading. To love God is to love the ways of God and trust God to be always right.

The second principle Jesus affirms is to “love our neighbor as we do ourselves.” When asked about how to define “neighbor,” Jesus told the story of the man beaten by thugs and left for dead. The “true” neighbors were not those who religiously ignored him, but the man who humbled himself to serve him. “Neighbor” is an active word that expresses compassion to the next person one meets that needs it. A compassionate person puts the well-being of others next to their own. Love always must be lived out “to win.” Victory is not in getting what you want, but in living God’s love in God’s strength. We cannot “win” on our own, but God can “win” through us.

The words in 1 John 4:7, 8 and 12 also are appropriate here: “Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. … No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us, and his love is made complete in us.”

To “hang in there,” just keep loving and showing love. Love is contagious. Love them until you love the evil out of them. It works. I am a witness. It works.

Emmanuel McCall, pastor

Fellowship Group Baptist Church, East Point, Ga.

Adjunct faculty, McAfee School of Theology,

Mercer University, Atlanta

Right or Wrong? is sponsored by the T.B. Maston Chair of Christian Ethics at Hardin-Simmons University's Logsdon School of Theology. Send your questions about how to apply your faith to [email protected].