Maston Lecture: Christians show love by listening

The Bible calls Christians to be people of the truth who know their neighbors and love them well, Mandy McMichael told East Texas Baptist University students. And listening is a profound act of Christian love, she emphasized.

“Listening is our window into understanding,” she said. “It helps us find connection to others and illuminates parts of ourselves.”

McMichael, a church historian in the religion department at Baylor University, delivered the T.B. Maston Lecture in Christian Ethics at ETBU on March 17. The lecture series is sponsored by the T.B. Maston Foundation, which is dedicated to continuing the legacy of the pioneering 20th century Baptist ethicist.

Jesus commanded his followers to love their neighbors, and that means Christians have an ethical obligation to know their neighbors and not bear false witness as they interact with them, McMichael told an ETBU chapel audience.

“It includes not only not lying about our neighbors, but also not scheming against them, not dealing unjustly with them, and not telling falsehood about them,” she said.

Christians show love for neighbors and concern for the truth when they take the time to listen attentively, she said. Recalling the admonition recorded in James 1:19 to be “quick to listen [and] slow to speak,” she challenged the students to become good listeners.

‘Listening is a radical act of love’

“Listening is a radical act of love that aids in the Christian commandment to love our neighbors, to avoid bearing false witness and to tell the truth,” McMichael said. “Listening helps us fulfill our ethical obligation to know our neighbors and to love them well.”

Christians show love by the selfless act of truly paying attention to someone else, she noted.

“Listening demands our full attention. It shifts our gaze off of ourselves and places it on someone else,” McMichael said.

To listen to someone demands time and energy, but it creates a foundation of trust, she observed.

“Listening is a lot of work, but it is important work, and it is more than worth it,” she said.

The act of listening presumes a desire to know and understand others as they share their stories, McMichael continued.

“We cannot know and truly understand people if we do not listen,” she said. “We cannot tell and appreciate the fullness of their stories if we do not listen to them first.”

‘Take great care with people’s stories’

McMichael described her academic research into the link between the church and beauty pageants, particularly in the South, that resulted in her book, Miss America’s God: Faith and Identity in America’s Oldest Pageant.

The experience demanded not only reading and observing, but also respectful and attentive listening to participants and their families, she noted.

“Throughout that process, I learned how to be a better listener. I learned how to take great care with people’s stories—stories that were not my own, stories that were different than mine and challenged my assumptions in big and small ways,” she said.

“As the people I was talking to at pageants began to understand that I was not trying to make fun of them or belittle them, but really trying to understand them, they opened up and began to talk more.”

Some opinions and attitudes McMichael had regarding pageants before her research remained, but “many, many more were adjusted along the way,” she confessed.

“I would have missed that if I had rushed to speak too quickly,” McMichael said.

For many pageant participants, other contestants are not just competitors, but also part of a valued community that provided them a sense of identity and belonging, she learned.

“The pageant was, for many of them, like an extended family,” McMichael said. “By pausing to listen, my understanding was deepened and enriched. Before I had critically appraised this thing I wanted to understand, I first had to hear it. I had to listen. … Listening is an act of humility that signals an openness to correction and growth.”

Listening is a ‘counter-cultural practice’

She challenged students to embrace listening as “a counter-cultural practice” in a society where everyone seeks the microphone.

Rather than assuming “we have it all figured out,” Christians—particularly those of a majority culture or race—should be willing to listen and learn, she asserted.

“We need each other,” McMichael said. “In listening, we receive a fuller picture of God’s love in the world. We begin to see beyond our narrow slice of life, to imagine the richness and creativity and joy of the God who loves us all.”

During her second lecture, delivered at a luncheon on the ETBU campus, McMichael presented additional reflections based on her research for Miss America’s God.

Her discovery that some participants discover their religious identity and vocation through the pageant community rather than—or in addition to—church involvement deserves additional attention, she noted.

“Pageant participants are not, I contend, the only women to seek identity and validation outside the walls of the church,” she said. “They represent all women who find themselves searching for meaning, purpose and any key—yes, even a crown—that opens doors and grants access to power.”

Sydney McBride of ETBU contributed to this article.